Strowman's FitBit vibrates as he reaches daily ambulance-destruction quota - Kayfabe News twitter google

Strowman’s FitBit vibrates as he reaches daily ambulance-destruction quota

Strowman ambulance

Braun Strowman reaches his daily ambulance-flipping goal. (Photo stolen with gratitude from http://imgur.com/user/YEEAAAGH)

Professional wrestler and feminist poet Braun Strowman felt the satisfying buzz of accomplishment this afternoon when, after destroying his third ambulance of the day, his FitBit vibrated on his wrist. 

“WAY TO GO,” flashed a message on the digital screen of Strowman’s FitBit, accompanied by the sound of crumpling steel, breaking glass, and the horrified screams of three paramedics trapped in the ambulance he flipped on a busy Chicago street. 

Strowman started wearing the wrist-mounted exercise-tracking device in January as part of a New Year’s resolution to “stay fit, have fun, and wreak havoc on emergency vehicles,” according to his blog, BraunAndBrains.com

He recently increased his daily quota from one ambulance to three, with the help of his friend and sparring partner Roman Reigns. 

Strowman’s fitness goals include adding more types of vehicles to his daily regimen (he hopes to begin destroying fire trucks and Coast Guard vessels by mid-year), and slimming down to a slender, sexy 175 pounds. 

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