US President Donald Trump’s controversial bill to repeal and replace Obamacare could put millions of Americans at risk — including countless professional wrestlers with pre-existing conditions. 

Among the conditions not covered under Trumpcare:

• Torn quads (or Nash Syndrome)
• Jerichoholism
• Muscle bust
• Latino heatstroke
• Harlem heatstroke
• X-Pac heatstroke 
• Bionic elbow
• Busted bronco
• Forgotten gravity
• Certified G (gonorrhea) 
• Epico colon 
• Cameltoe clutch
• Locked ankle
• Invisibility (Cena Syndrome)
• Saskatchewan spinning nerve disorder
• Missing ear
• People’s tennis elbow
• Yes lockjaw 
• Mandible claw
• Reeking of awesomeness 
• The Gorilla Monsoon Suite of Maladies: 
  • Torn lateral collateral ligaments
  • Dislocated patella and/or marella
  • Bruised external occipital protuberance 
  • Blows to the solar plexus, kidney area, breadbasket, and/or kisser
  • Excedrin headache no. 9
• Genetic freakishness
• Objects turned sideways inside candy ass
• Wrenched gut
• Dragged arm
• Botchulism
• Crimson mask
• Turned heel
• #Brokenness 
• Vanilla midget syndrome
• Togo dick
• Embarrassingly small package
• Wide-open bustedness 
• Bumped ref
• TNAIDS 
• Bastion boogers
• Stomped mudhole
• DDPee
• Shuffled five knuckles
• Belly-to-bellyache

The so-called Trumpcare plan already passed in the House of Representatives (America’s “creative team”), but it remains to be seen whether it will be approved by Senate (America’s “bookers”).