The grown children of legendary professional wrestler Mick Foley have agreed that their father is finally mature enough to learn that Santa Claus is not real.
“I think he’s ready,” said daughter Noelle, “It’ll break his heart, but I think it’s time. He’s in his fifties, after all.”
Despite his renown as a “hardcore legend” whose masochistic wrestling style showcased pain and suffering, Foley has always loved Santa — and truly believes the jolly old elf circumnavigates the globe in a reindeer-powered sleigh distributing gifts to children every Christmas.
He also wholeheartedly believes that a magical sock creature lives in his underpants, though nobody has had the heart to disavow him of that notion.
His son Dewey, who now works for WWE’s Creative Team, is torn about whether to finally tell his father that professional wrestling is rigged.