Luger sets out in Lex Express to campaign against Rusev - Kayfabe News twitter google

Luger sets out in Lex Express to campaign against Rusev

Rusev cena prediction

Lex Luger relaxes on the Lex Express, biding his time before vanquishing the nefarious Rusev.

In a noble display of patriotism, former professional wrestler Lex Luger has once again set out on a cross-country bus tour to rally American pride and speak out against dastardly Russian (well, Bulgarian) Rusev.

Luger is undeterred that the so-called Lex Express, a once-luxurious coach bedecked with the stars and stripes, has seen better days: the transmission is shot, the air-conditioning doesn’t work, and became infested with possums while parked for 20 years behind WWE’s Connecticut headquarters.

What’s more, Luger cannot afford to pay a driver — and WWE has refused to subsidize or endorse the bus journey in any way — so Luger is driving himself across country.

“None of that matters,” says the ever-optimistic (some would say narcissistic) Luger, whose once-rippling muscles have all but vanished under his leathery skin.

“What matters is that we put a stop to that evil commie and show him that America is the best country on earth — except for maybe Canada.”

Luger intends to culminate the Lex Express journey by bodyslamming a cardboard cutout of Rusev on an aircraft carrier.

The US Navy, however, issued a statement today confirming that Luger’s will be shot on sight if he attempts to board the USS Intrepid.

Share This on Facebook

Follow Kayfabe News

Kayfabe :

The lost art of keeping a secret in professional wrestling.

Kayfabe News :

Unreal news about an unreal sport.