Hip-hop artist Kid Ink announced today that his much-anticipated concert at Levi’s Stadium in northern California tonight will feature a number of professional wrestling matches.
The rapper, a tattooed and talentless anorexic who makes Flo Rida seem like a musical genius by comparison, will lips-sync and bounce around like a toddler while muscular men in spandex grapple for the amusement of the crowd.
The concert will feature cameo appearances by Sting, The Undertaker, and other flavor-of-the-month novelty acts.
Kid Ink announced on Twitter that he will perform many of his greatest hits, including “Like a Hott Boyy,” “Every City We Go,” “Bossin’ up,” and other songs that demonstrate his third-grade literacy level.
Up to 80,000 fans are expected to attend the concert, which is also scheduled to feature one of the guys from Blink-182, somebody named Skylar Gray and, to appease fans who prefer more melodically satisfying music, a yowling cat delivering a litter of kittens.
Said one fan on Twitter: “At least it’s not Limp Bizkit.”