Matt Hardy appointed U.S. Chief Deleter of Inconvenient Truths - Kayfabe News twitter google

Matt Hardy appointed U.S. Chief Deleter of Inconvenient Truths

hardy trump

Matt Hardy delivered a cryptic, strangely accented speech declaring he will “even delete deletion.”

The Trump administration announced today that professional wrestler #Broken Matt Hardy has been tasked with the responsibility of deleting all information from federal websites that President Donald Trump deems untrue.

Hardy met with the president in the Oval Office today to accept the position, then performed a short piano concerto before driving a mower erratically across the White House lawn.

With Brother Nero by his side, Hardy then accessed the website of the Environmental Protection Agency (EPA), replacing all instances of the term “climate change” with “Mattitude.”

Hardy’s next job will be to delete all online mentions of science, solar power, wind power, the sun, wind, Hillary Clinton, Rosie O’Donnell, reason, logic and common sense.

Hardy’s previous political experience was in his role as Chief Email Deleter for the Clinton campaign.

Although Hardy said, in a bizarre pseudo-British accent, that he is “honoured to be appointed” to the new role, he expressed dismay when he learned that Senor Benjamin had been deported.

 

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