All Articles

Limp Bizkit
February 29, 2012
In an unprecedented piece of showbiz negotiation, World Wrestling Entertainment has struck a deal with rap-metal band Limp Bizkit to…
Ring of Bonor
February 28, 2012
An unfortunate typo resulted in a mob of unsavory people showing up at a Toronto arena for what was advertised…
February 27, 2012
Dolph Ziggler was beaming with pride yesterday when, after months of puppy training, he finally got his dog, a scrappy…
February 27, 2012
Kayfabe News has learned that legendary hardcore wrestler Mick Foley recently signed a deal with publisher Knopf Doubleday to release…
Paul Heyman
February 25, 2012
Wrestling promoter and personality Paul Heyman had a self-described “epiphany moment” yesterday when he realized that his ever-present baseball cap…
rick rude wwe dead
February 24, 2012
Sources in heaven tell Kayfabe News that “Ravishing” Rick Rude frequently insists that male angels, souls and other ethereal beings…
Madonna Kaballah
February 23, 2012
Fans of legendary pop queen Madonna were shocked yesterday to learn that she is not, as previously believed, a follower…
Lanny Poffo
February 22, 2012
The subject of ongoing scholarly debate and study, Lanny Poffo’s poetic oeuvre remains as intriguing and polarizing as it was…
Vickie Guerrero
February 21, 2012
An embarrassed Vickie Guerrero failed to smooth over a delicate situation yesterday by shrieking “excuse me” after an unexpected burst…
Don't try this at home
February 20, 2012
Shortly after purchasing his copy of WWE ‘13 for Playstation 3, local half-wit Craig Williamson threw down his controller in…
Abdullah the Butcher
February 19, 2012
Shuffling toward his bathroom in the dark for a late-night pee, Abdullah the Butcher stubbed his toe on a door…
Punjabi Prison
February 17, 2012
Confidential documents leaked from WWE headquarters in Stamford reveal that Jinder Mahal was hired primarily so the company would have…
Thurman Sparky Plugg
February 16, 2012
After a long and moderately successful WWE career, Bob Holly is returning to what he calls his “first true love,”…
Eric Young Gimmicks
February 15, 2012
TNA Wrestling mainstay “Showtime” Eric Young announced yesterday that he is nearly ready to unveil his 100th character gimmick. “It’s…
February 14, 2012
Sources close to Vince Russo report that the infamous wrestling matchmaker has somehow even managed to screw up the booking…
Tugboat Costa
February 14, 2012
Former WWE wrestler Tugboat arrived in Tuscany yesterday to lend his strength and seafaring experience to the recovery of the…
John Laurinaitis
February 13, 2012
After suffering for years with a raspy voice and constricted larynx, WWE executive John Laurinaitis finally cleared his throat Monday,…
Cena Rock
February 13, 2012
In the main event of this year’s WrestleMania, star of bad movies Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson will square off against…
Tenta Earthquake
February 11, 2012
Scientists are struggling to explain the continuation of seismic activity around the world nearly six years after the passing of…
February 10, 2012
10. Law and Order: Otunga                 9. Tanning with Sheamus      …
Five Knuckle Shuffle
February 9, 2012
Despite its devastating effect when delivered by John Cena in the wrestling ring, the Five Knuckle Shuffle proved “frigging useless”…
Hogan bass
February 8, 2012
Wrestling legend Hulk Hogan sparked public concern about his mental health this week when he purported to be the current…
Wrestling sign
February 8, 2012
Despite spending several hours creating a large sign to hold aloft during Monday’s broadcast of WWE Raw, audience member Marshall…
Bella triplet
February 7, 2012
Motivated by jealousy of her pretty and famous sisters, Gladys Bella — the little-known Bella Triplet — has emerged from…